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We hear a lot about self-care these days, but the version we get sold is usually very neat and marketable. It looks like quiet meditation spaces, candles, or taking a long bath (and there is nothing wrong with any of those!). But the actual reality of practising self-care is often incredibly inconvenient...

A couple of days ago my grocery delivery was over an hour late. When the driver finally arrived, I asked how he was doing. It was brutal out there even at 10 am, and they were running significantly behind after a warehouse fridge breakdown knocked everything out of kilter.. He said his office had...

I want to tell you about a man I know of. He is in his seventies, retired, well-liked, and by most measures has had a good life. He is the kind of person people are fond of. Warm, easy to be around, someone who makes others feel comfortable. After a working life he was proud of, he stepped back and took...

I nearly didn't write this post. Not because I don't have anything to say. If anything, I have too much. But because there's a version of professional life where therapists are supposed to have it together. Where we speak about hardship from a careful distance, using phrases like 'when clients experience...'...

Have you ever said, or heard someone say, "that's just how I am"? Or perhaps something even more final-sounding: "it's just my basic nature." Maybe it's about being someone who shuts down in arguments, or who always puts others first, or who can't seem to stop criticising themselves. Delivered with...